Meaningful Ways to Remember a Loved One who died

Losing someone we love can leave an emptiness that feels impossible to fill. Often, we want to honour them, to carry a sense of their presence with us, and to find ways to continue feeling connected. Over years of counselling clients and working in a bereavement service, I’ve witnessed the deep comfort that comes from small, meaningful acts of remembrance. These practices can provide solace, help us process grief, and remind us that love doesn’t have to end with death.

Why it Matters so much to Remember a Loved One who Died

Many people worry that revisiting memories or creating rituals will keep them “stuck” in grief. In reality, the opposite is true. Research and grief counselling practice highlight the "continuing bonds" theory, which suggests that maintaining a connection to the person we’ve lost is a natural, healthy way of accommodating grief. By remembering them, we aren’t holding onto the past - we’re embedding the loss into our lives in a way that feels nourishing, instead of overwhelming.

Acts of remembrance allow the brain to process grief gradually. If you’re interested in how grief physically impacts the brain and why these connections are so powerful, you can explore it further in my blog on how the brain adjusts to grief.

Gentle Ways Keep the Memories Alive

Remembering a loved one who has died doesn’t have to be grand or public. Many of the most meaningful ways are personal and intimate, tailored to the relationship you shared.

Here are some approaches that have brought comfort to clients:

• Engaging in activities they loved: One client found solace in kicking a football at the oval for a sibling who loved sport. Another took walks by the water, a place that had always connected them with their loved one, bringing moments of calm and reflection.

• Honouring special places or experiences: Holidaying in a favourite spot, cooking a cherished family recipe, or revisiting locations that hold memories can make grief feel more integrated into daily life.

• Music and creativity: Some clients write songs or create playlists in memory of their loved one. Creative expression can be deeply connecting, offering both release and a way to celebrate who they were.

• Family gatherings and rituals: Annual events on birthdays, anniversaries, or other meaningful dates provide space for remembrance and shared reflection. Watching old movies, enjoying a favourite film together, or simply sharing stories keeps the connection alive.

• Journaling and letters: Writing letters on special days or maintaining a grief journal can help articulate feelings and memories that might be difficult to speak aloud.

• Personal belongings: Holding onto treasured items, clothing, or photographs can provide comfort. Wearing a scarf that belonged to them or looking at a framed photo often evokes a sense of closeness.

• Living their values: Sometimes the act of remembering is subtler - honouring the qualities or principles your loved one cherished in life, from kindness to curiosity, allows their spirit to continue influencing your choices.

  
  

These practices don’t “trap” you in grief - they offer a framework to hold the love and memory of someone who has died, while still moving forward in your own life.

Finding Support Along the Way

Grief is deeply personal, but you don’t have to navigate it alone. As a counsellor with years of experience supporting clients through loss, I provide a space to explore your memories, understand your feelings, and discover ways to keep the connection alive while caring for yourself. Whether you meet for in-person counselling in the Sutherland Shire, online counselling, or through gentle walking counselling sessions in nature, grief counselling can help you find your own meaningful practices for remembrance.

If you’ve noticed that grief feels heavy or confusing, or you want support in exploring ways to remember a loved one who has passed away, reach for a free initial chat. Together, we can find compassionate ways to honour your loved one while helping you adjust to life after loss.

Grief & Bereavement Counselling

Counselling, Sutherland Shire

Online Counselling

Taking comfort in the little things that remind us of loved ones can be deeply healing in grief.