Grief is more than sadness: Understanding the full range of emotions in loss
- The Counselling Cove
- Aug 9
- 3 min read
Updated: Aug 24
Loss comes in many forms - the end of a relationship, the death of someone you love, a job redundancy, a sudden health change, or a chapter closing unexpectedly.
Whatever the form, loss has a way of stirring up more than just sadness. You might feel angry, relieved, lonely, numb, guilty - sometimes all in the space of a single day. It can be confusing to hold so many emotions at once, especially when they don’t match what you expected to feel.
All of this is grief.
Not only the grief we often associate with death, but the emotional landscape that comes any time something we value is taken away, or changes in a way we didn’t choose.
When we talk about grief, it’s often spoken about as though it’s a simple synonym for sadness - as if grief is just one feeling. But grief isn’t just sadness. Grief is a whole-body, whole-heart response - a deeply human, often disorienting reaction to losing something or someone that mattered to you. It touches every part of us: emotionally, physically, mentally, and even spiritually. And it rarely arrives as just one feeling. More often, it’s a shifting, sometimes contradictory mix of experiences that can change from one moment to the next.
You might feel angry - at the unfairness of it all, at the circumstances, at others, even at the person or situation connected to the loss.
You might feel guilt - for words not said, for things you did or didn’t do, for surviving, or for those unexpected moments of joy amidst the pain.
You might feel shame - wondering if you’re grieving “the right way,” or if your reactions are somehow too much or not enough.
You might feel fear - of what life looks like now, of how you’ll cope, or of more change and loss in the future.
You might feel relief - especially after a long period of stress, illness, or a complex relationship or situation - and then feel conflicted about that relief.
You might feel numb - like you’re moving through life in a fog, disconnected from the world around you.
You might feel lonely - even in a room full of people - because your inner world feels so different, so hard to explain.
And yes, you may also feel deep sadness - aching, soul-level sadness.
These are all inherently human responses to loss.
Grief is not neat. It doesn’t follow a tidy timeline or stick to a predictable script. You might cry one moment and laugh the next. You might feel steady for days, then find yourself undone by a smell, a song, or a date on the calendar. This is grief doing what grief does - moving in waves, circling back, rising and falling.
And underneath it all, there is meaning.
Because grief, at its core, is a response to something that mattered - a relationship, a role, a future you imagined, a version of life you held dear. Often, it is love. Other times, it’s complexity, history, hope, or hurt.
Grief shows up because something - or someone - had significance, even if that meaning is layered, painful, or unresolved.
How Counselling Can Help in Grief
Grief is personal, but it doesn’t have to be solitary.
Sometimes the emotional weight feels too heavy to carry alone, or too tangled to understand. Counselling can be a place to gently unpack those feelings - all of them - without judgment or pressure to “move on.”
Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed, numb, angry, relieved, or unsure how you’re meant to feel, your experience is valid. It matters.
Grief counselling is about honouring what you’ve lost, making space for the emotions that arise, and finding ways to live alongside your grief - one compassionate step at a time.
If you feel it might help to have a steady, understanding space as you navigate this chapter, I offer grief counselling in a calm, private setting where all feelings are welcome. You don’t have to have the right words, or even know where to begin.
Together, we can simply start where you are.
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