When "doing your best" starts to feel like never enough

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You might be known for being reliable, organised, or the one who always gives 110%. From the outside, it can look like you have everything together - after all, perfectionism wears a convincing mask of high standards, reliability, and a drive to achieve. 

 

But for those living it inside, it can feel like you’re constantly chasing an invisible finish line. You may replay small mistakes, overthink decisions, or feel anxious about letting others down. Even when things go well, there’s often that quiet inner voice whispering, “you could’ve done better.”

 

It’s understandable to feel exhausted by that constant striving. Adult counselling offers a place to pause, take a breath, and begin loosening the grip of perfectionism - not by letting go of your care or standards, but by learning to hold them with more kindness.​

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Understanding perfectionism

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Perfectionism often grows from a place of deep care - a desire to do well, to be dependable, or to feel safe and valued. Over time, though, that care can start to carry a heavy weight, especially when it’s tied to fears of falling short or being judged. After a while, it can begin to make you feel trapped in cycles of stress, self-criticism, or burnout.

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For many people, these patterns have been shaped by life experiences - moments where working hard, achieving, or keeping everything together felt like the best way to be accepted or stay in control. These ways of coping can be protective, even if they’ve started to feel limiting or exhausting now.

 

Living with that constant pressure can make it hard to rest, take risks, or feel content with your efforts. You might notice tension, overthinking, or a sense that no matter how much you do, it’s never quite enough.

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The good news is that perfectionism can soften. You can learn to meet yourself with the same compassion you offer others and find a more balanced, kind way of striving.

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Counselling for perfectionism in Sutherland Shire and southern Sydney

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Counselling provides a gentle space to step back from the pressure and start pouring into yourself. Together, we can explore how perfectionism shows up in your life, the impact it has on your wellbeing and relationships, and the experiences that may have shaped it - with curiosity and care, not judgment. You’ll have space to understand your inner critic, notice patterns that keep you stuck, and learn practical ways to ease self-pressure. I offer a warm, collaborative space - never pushing for change before you’re ready. My approach draws from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) to provide gentle, effective tools for shifting unhelpful thinking, cultivating self-compassion, and discovering that you are already worthy, capable, and enough.

 

I offer individual counselling from Caringbah in the Sutherland Shire, online counselling Australia-wide, or even Walk & Talk Therapy. Feel free to reach out for a free initial chat if you would like to explore it further.

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